Why should I care about the Orlando shooting?

I’m ashamed to admit that my first response was gladness when the Twin Towers fell on 9/11. I was a 12-year-old Australian teacher’s pet and it was my turn to share the ‘news-of-the-day’. I was excited to have such big news to share with my classmates but when I arrived at school, my teacher’s face was downcast. She cancelled my news-of-the-day sharing and put on the TV for us all to watch. It wasn’t until I really started to watch what was happening at ground zero in New York that I understood my foolishness. I understood that it was a big deal. I understood that our lives would never be the same because of it.

Having said that, I was still in primary school and when I got home that afternoon to watch Passions (oh my gosh, did you secretly love that show as much as me?), all I could find was news replaying the same footage on every channel. It continued for the rest of the week and it didn’t take me long to get bored of it and wish that it’d stop being such a big deal and that they’d change the programming back to normal.

And today, as I saw yet another American mass shooting headline in my Facebook feed (the Orlando shootings, that is), I felt a lot like these Americans, that it was just another ordinary day in America.

I resisted the urge to glaze over it and get on with my day but instead looked at a couple of videos and news articles covering the shooting. As I did, it reminded me of that day back in primary school and the same selfish question tugged at me: so what? It doesn’t affect me.

Because honestly, I’m a bit numb to it all. I was numb when I heard about the Charlie Hebdo shootings in France, numb when I heard about the Brussels bombings, numb when I heard about the Jakarta attacks, even numb when I also read in the news today that in Redcliffe this morning, just north of where I’m originally from, there was a man holding hostages with a homemade gun.

But seriously, how are these attacks relevant to my life? It doesn’t affect me. Not directly at least. Or does it? Take pre-9/11 and compare it to today. The International Business Times says that the world has changed in our airport security, immigration laws, introduction of domestic spying, lack of trust in the government, fluctuating tourism, and individual levels of fear and anxiety, all as a result of 9/11.

Okay, big deal if I have to arrive earlier to the airport. Tell me, why should I care about what’s happening in the world? Should I grieve for the loss of the dead? Or for those left behind? Should I be angry with America’s gun laws and be indignant that Australia and many other countries are living examples of strict gun laws that work? Should I increase my fear of Daesh (ISIL)? Or should I just get on with my life and my own selfish, first-world problems?

I’m looking to those of you around me for direction – how should I respond? What should this mean to me, despite my numbness?

With regards to the Colorado shooting, Pope Francis publicly expressed “deepest feelings of horror and condemnation” and Vatican spokesman the Rev. Federico Lombardi said on behalf of him that he denounces the “homicidal folly and senseless hatred” and that he would join the families of victims and injured in “prayer and compassion”.

In prayer and compassion. Truly how much of this am I lacking? This is where my numbness has gotten me. I feel ashamed.

Many cloistered nuns practice something called ‘praying the news’ (to digest the daily news and intercede on behalf of the world’s problems), which has sparked the more recent, ‘praying the newsfeed’ – that is, the social newsfeed (like Facebook).

And so today as I meditate on my shameful lack of compassion, I learn my answer. I should care about the Orlando shooting, about any of the aforementioned horrors, because their problems are in fact my problems. Not just because it may lead to an attack on me or my family or my community one day. No, despite our different coloured skin, despite living on the other side of the world, despite the fact that there seems to be a new story of this kind every day, the base truth that I had forgotten is that these are still my brothers and sisters in Christ – the victims and perpetrators. Just because I was born in a different, seemingly safer country, doesn’t change that.

It’s time for me to set aside the numbness, and take a moment each day to pray the newsfeed. Will you pray with me?

And to the victims and survivors (and their families) of the Orlando shootings, I am sorry for my selfishness. Know that you are now in my prayers.

#praythenewsfeed